Forever Freelancer | Ester Kim
Freelance production designer and filmmaker. Los Angeles and Madrid. 13 years freelancing.
Was there a moment, a meeting, a Monday, a very specific email, that made you think "I can't keep doing this." What was yours?
That point in the project when they cut your crew and very meticulously crafted budget mid-prep two days before the shoot and you try to make it work because of all the bridges you've burnt throwing a tantrum in the past and then you realize it's not working and it's not going to work because it's never worked and your whole crew is suffering and then you're angry and you end up burning the bridge anyway. You know?
Going into freelancing, what did you think the hardest part would be, and what's the hardest part actually?
I was not thinking, going into freelancing. I just thought it would all work out because I was 20 years old. The hardest part is people management. Some people are really good at it — it's the most important skill that tops any technical skill or talent when it comes to developing a career and maintaining momentum. That and emotional regulation in a high-stress environment that does not allow you much time for reflection or pause. I remember when I started I thought all production designers were batshit crazy. Now I understand why.
What's the skill you've had to develop that has absolutely nothing to do with what you actually do, but makes or breaks everything?
Meditation and balance. Having trust and confidence in yourself. Not having those tools could get you sent to the hospital.
If you had to pick up to three GIFs to describe the energy of a memorable moment or project, what are we watching?
Ignoring all red flags because of the state of our economy:
Materials funds never coming in on time:
At the last hour forgetting what the assignment was:
What's a phrase that instantly tells you a project is about to become complicated?
"It should be pretty chill."
What's the most freelancer sentence you've ever typed?
Tell us the lowest rate you ever accepted. The actual figure. No rounding up for dignity.
$0. Some of my favorite projects I've done for free. But if you're working for free it has to be with intention. Your rule should always be to never work for free. But sometimes you'll have a friend that you career-grew up with in this crazy town — you used to make stupid five-minute sketches in your backyard with whatever props you had in your fridge — and now they want to make something real, something meaningful, and to be a part of that growth is so beautiful. Also when I first moved to LA I was paid $200 a week on a feature, but from there I found the bridges that allowed me to make the move without ever having gone to film school or knowing anything about the industry. Some things you can't put a price on — but the key is always to listen very intently to your intuition. If there's any peep that it's not a good idea, don't take it.
What would you put on a business card that actually captures what you do?
Glorified furniture mover.
What have you gained that would've been difficult to find anywhere else?
A special kind of bond with the crews I work with. In this world you get to choose who you bring back — there is zero obligation to anyone you have worked with in the past. The team has become a family. They are my best friends who have seen me at my best and worst, and I choose them and trust them with my life every day.
Finish the sentence: "Forever Freelancer means…"
"It's all up to you, bb."